![]() ![]() Ok, so I lied about the farts, but Confucius say too damn much on the topic.Įither way, you must admit that I’m an expert in the collection of quotes. Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.Īt least three of those implied farts with toilet or poop references….Man who lay girl on hillside is not on the level.It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.Man who take sleeping pill and laxative on the same night will wake up in deep shit.You start with pair and end with full house. Woman who wear jockstrap have make believe ballroom.Virginity like bubble: one prick, all gone.Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it.Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in own hands.Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time.Man who fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of A flat miner.Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father. ![]() Man who put head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.He who thinks only of number one must remember this number is next to nothing.Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.When called an idiot, better to be quiet than open mouth and remove all doubt.Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion!.Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.War not determine who is right, war determine who is left.Man who run in front of car get tired.Man who not poop for many days must take care of back log.You will impress with your vast wisdom and surely be promoted to the head of some department which is a pretty good start for any overlord during these tough economical times. Say them slowly, quizzically, and with intense glaring passion. If you want to conquer the world you need to memorize these quotes and spit-them-out whenever it’s your turn to talk during very important business meetings. What’s left is the Ultimate Top 27 list… A list of the most witty, intelligent, and actually funny Confucius say quotes. I’ve removed all the stupid ones and 93% of the sexist ones. … there are thousands of Confucius say quotes out there, but most suck. It will surely give a big beautiful smile to your lips. You can read, understand and implement it in your life. It can give a guarantee to make your life more bright. It will give a funny inspirational quote for people. "If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.The following is the ultimate top 27 list of Confucius say quotes. Augby Rahul Panchal Funny Words of Wisdom because Laughter gets as the best medicine for life.In the winter we had to wrap our feet with barbed wire for traction." -Bill Flavin "In my day, we couldn’t afford shoes, so we went barefoot."Don’t look back, something might be gaining on you." -Satchel Paige. ![]() They can do too much to themselves, they last too long." -Bertolt Brecht "People are too durable, that's their main trouble."I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown, which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments." -Jim Morrison."In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular." -Kathleen Norris. ![]()
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